I Don't Do Lists.

The Arcade Fire, Rilo Kiley, Sufjan Stevens, Fiery Furnaces, Joanna Newsom, Modest Mouse, Iron & Wine, Futureheads, Interpol, Franz Ferdinand. Got your attention? No, it's not my top ten list. I don't do lists. (Aren't you tired of the same old lists?) But I would like to help those in need in South Asia, so please give by clicking the link below.


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I'll be back with more lost bands in 2005.

Game Theory - "Christmas Moog"

Scott Miller's Game Theory released several albums in the 80's that went sadly unnoticed by the public despite crtical raves. The San Francisco Bay area band's melodic and sometimes experimental pop was not demand in a world of dance music and hair metal. The now out-of-print CDs have sold for over $100 on ebay. In the early 90's Scott changed the name of the band to the Loud Family and continues to record. Since a Christmas tune is not a fair way to represent this incredible band (and I think you've had enough of all this holiday music), you can find a page of downloads over at The Loud Family website.

Find out more about Game Theory and Loud Family and get mp3's here

Get hard-to-find Game Theory CD's here

Go to the download page to get Game Theory - "Christmas Moog"

The Mysteroids (the Revillos) - "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town"

The Mysteroids were actually the Revillos. The Revillos formed after the breakup of the Rezillos in 1978. There were many members of the band but the core members were Eugene Reynolds and Fay Fife from the Rezillos and Rocky Rhythm from the Pork Dukes. The band thought it wouldn't be cool for the Revillos to release a Christmas single so they used the name Mysteroids. "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" was released as a single on the Superville label in 1981.

One of the premiere clubs in New Jersey in the early 80's was Hitsville in Passaic. The club paid host to a who's who of bands including, U2, the Go-Go's, Stiff Little Fingers, A Flock Of Seagulls, 999, Our Daughter's Wedding, Lords Of The New Church, Billy Idol and a show that I attended, the Revillos. "The Rhythm Method", written by Revillos drummer Rocky Rhythm (Nicky Forbes), is due to be published in 2005. Here is a short excerpt from a chapter on the band's American tours and a visit to Hitsville in Passaic, NJ.: (Warning the following is not suitable for young audiences.)

Another day, another gig, another bar. Today we were in Passaic, NJ. That's a bit like coming all the way from America expecting to play cool rock gigs in London and it transpires you are booked into a workingman's club on the outskirts of Romford, Essex. At that time it was almost considered a federal offence to come from New Jersey (and Romford, Essex). Probably still is, except in the intervening years Springsteen and Bon Jovi have made it a mite more hip (New Jersey, not Romford, Essex). We made no money that night so I decided I might as well at least shag someone and make something of the evening. Some people were really there to see us but much of them were a largely confused audience but there was, fortunately, a gaggle of girls. They loved the show and some seemed desperate for excitement in their glum lives; something to make them forget they were stuck for all eternity in Passaic. I wasn't that excitement, but heck, I wasn't going to let that stop me. After the gig, all the girls stood in line just outside the dressing room door, the way girls were frequently prone to do, as they tried to get off with someone from the band. One said to me,

"You English guys have such nice accents. Just like in da moovies!"

"You, too, darlin,'" I replied as this phrase I was beginning to hear repeated frequently.

I could take my pick and was easily persuaded by a nice brunette wearing a purple frock coat, who said,

"Hi. I really wanna fuck you, blond boy. I wanna fuck you right now. I'll pay for the motel." Then she said, "I've got booze." I was already happy to accept her offer when she added, as a clincher, "I've got my Mustang parked outside."

"Motel? Mustang? Alcohol? Sex? Oh, OK."

The car stereo was pounding out the Clash's 'I'm So Bored Of The USA'. As I stepped into the car she stepped on the gas, turned the stereo down to a deafening blast and drove me off into the night. She unzipped my jeans and stuck her hand in for a rummage around. She found what she was looking for. Somewhere on the outskirts of town the Mustang skidded into the dusty parking lot of a run-down, seedy motel with a faulty, flickering neon sign. I sat in the car with a thumping hard-on, knocking back her bottle of brandy as she paid for the lodgings.

The motel room stank. A shoal of fat bluebottles flew around the one unprotected light bulb blazing down. The room had all the ambience of a murder scene. The TV didn't work, as usual. The bed sheets were dirty, so dirty that even I noticed, so I turned out the light. It was not a tourist-type motel. It was a shag hole. Well, what else did I expect? Cars came and went all night long, just like the clientele. What I thought was the relentless noise of crickets in the still night air was actually the sound of unzipping zippers.

The last thing I expected the motel to have was a vibrating waterbed, but it did. This will impress her, I thought while pushing a dollar in the slot. It didn't work. Shoving me onto the bed she got her tits out and licked them. She slowly pulled my jeans down and I held the back of her head as I watched her go down on me by the red, flashing neon of the motel sign. Later, we screwed through some of the night and it was daybreak by the time I fell asleep. She was gone when I awoke. I wonder what her name was?

Thanks to Rocky Rhythm for this sneak peek at his upcoming book. Rocky continues to play and tour with the Pork Dukes.

You can find "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" on the reissued and remastered "Attack" cd as well as the Revillos catalog at Captain Oi.

Go to the download page to get the Revillos - "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town"

Blake Xolton & the Martians - "Merry Christmas"

"BLAKE XOLTON IS, TO TELL IT STRAIGHT, AN UNDISPUTED UNDER-GROUND LEGEND IN HIS NATIVE LOTUS LAND OF L.A. ON THIS, THE WEST COAST PUNDITS AND SOOTHSAYERS ALL AGREE. ONCE A JEALOUSLY GUARDED MANTRA AMONG THE INTELLIGENTSIA AND ART CROWD, XOLTON'S NAME NOW SHRIEKS FROM THE FEVERED LIPS OF THE SWINGING CREEPERS WHO STORM THE BOULEVARDS AND HAUNT THE BACK ALLEYS OF HOLLYWOOD WHEN THE MOON IS FULL AND THE SPIRITS ARE HIGH." So says his website (in caps). I need not say more except that the wall of sound of "Merry Christmas" appeared on the Bomp! Records "Experiment With Destiny" compilation and Charlotte Caffey of the Go-Go's provided background vocals. Blake has worked with a who's who of the music business including none other than the Wall Of Sound master Phil Spector himself, Rodney Bingenheimer, The Ramones, Blondie, Nikki & the Corvettes, Plimsouls and many, many others.

Go to the download page to get Blake Xolton & the Martians - "Merry Christmas"